Will Tripp by Harry Stein

Author:Harry Stein
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: humor, satire, irony, antifeminist, harry stein, antiliberal, antisocialist, leftwing fakers
Publisher: Harry Stein

She cocked her hand to her ear—and from all sides came the sobs, in unembarrassed profusion. “More!” she enthused. “More! It feels so good, doesn’t it?” Then, spreading her arms wide, she proclaimed, “Yes! We weep together, in pain and solidarity! We weep because we are wounded! We weep because we are scared! We weep because otherwise we must mourn!”

Will raised an eyebrow. “I don’t get it. What does that mean?”

“That’s ‘cause you don’t spend enough time around here.”

“It is scary being scared,” continued Dr. Barber, in a softer voice. “Unfortunately, I cannot tell you not to be—not after what we have all experienced. Not when we never know who’s out there, waiting. Waiting around the next corner, or even in the dorm room down the hall.” She paused. “This is why I promise you, in this sacred place, that we at the Counseling Center will always be there for you. Classes may be suspended, but the Counseling Center will remain open 24/7, three hundred and sixty-five days a year! We are always there, so we can be scared as one, in togetherness!”

With a flourish, Dr. Barber swept off to the side. There was a momentary silence, and then Dr. Frank, Chester’s president, rose from his seat in the front pew to take her place. He surveyed the audience a long moment. “I love you all. At this moment I feel that more strongly than I ever have.”

“We love you!” a lone voice answered back.

He nodded. “I know you do. And I also know how much you love this institution, with its long tradition of positive human interaction.” He paused. “You came here to learn, and what you have learned here at Chester is far more important than anything to be found by reading books or sitting in classrooms. You’ve received an education in being human. You’ve learned what it means to stand up against those who would deny the precious humanity of others!”

Despite himself, Will had to acknowledge that the guy’s delivery was better than that of a lot of the assholes he faced off against in court. Already he had the room in the palm of his hand. Even his brother was leaning forward, rapt.

“But lately we have learned something new and terrible: that there are some within our very own community who are full of bigotry and hate. And, yes, one of our most beloved own has suffered the awful consequences.”

He paused dramatically, then thrust his arm toward the closed door on the side. “My friends, the bravest person I know!”

The instant Francine Grabler walked through the door, the place erupted. Draped in a fire engine red muu muu, she walked haltingly, obviously not fully recovered from her ordeal, and Frank rushed over to help ease her to the front. When she got there, the crowd rose as a body with a joyous roar. Grabler stood with uplifted face, modest and radiant, as the sound showered down upon her.

At last President Frank raised his hands, and the noise began to subside.

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